I woke up today with a plan. To go to work, to go home for lunch, to go back to work, to go to the gym, to go home.
So what did I do? Only some of that.
I went to work, of course…after having major closet dilemma. Someone please take all my clothes. All of them. I’ve fallen out of love.
When lunchtime came around, of course I did not stick to my money-saving plan.
Sometimes a gal needs a (black bean) burger and fries. The thought of another salad for lunch was just too sad.
At least my coworker, C-Breezy, and I talked about consolidating loans. That’s a nod to money-saving for sure.
I did go back to work for the remainder of the afternoon, but afterward, something called me away from the gym. You see, the gym is a safe haven— a place in which I don’t spend money and I’m not sitting on my duff all night. But there are times the gym (or on my running path) is the last place I want to be. There is a place, however, that I always want to be.
This is what $50 at Whole Foods looks like:
I was mostly pumped to find two newer vegan products.
Upton's Naturals Chorizo Seitan + Daiya Jack-Style Wedge.
Even though I’m not on the vegan train right now, I still love to check out the latest products. I crumbled some of the seitan over some greens and broccoli slaw for part of dinner (when salad did not feel gaggy):
Meaty. Kind of.
It’s good but it lost the chorizo flavor under the TJ’s peanut vinaigrette. Also my stomach is in shambles. But you don’t need to know that. Back to the point.
Sometimes I get so comfortable with a routine that it’s hard to break out of it, and it scares me— it reminds me of a too-controlling version of myself whom I like to think I left behind. I have a million reasons in my mind. I can’t do X instead of Y because X costs more/takes more time/means I won’t have enough time tonight to work out and blog and wash my clothes and watch New Girl and finish The Paris Wife even though I’m not enjoying it and…! When I start to feel this way, I do whatever is the opposite of my routine. Today it was food shopping, doing my laundry, hanging out with the pups and watching Weeds, Glee and New Girl.
This morning, a yoga instructor who used to teach at our workplace tweeted, “Don’t just do something, sit there.” And I thought, “YES!” That is what I need. I don’t want to feel guilty for wanting to chill out sometimes. I don’t want to feel guilty for sitting still all night and letting my mind relax after working all day. I’m 24 and don’t have the huge responsibility of children yet (and hope not to for at least another six years), so I need to take advantage! And besides, my self-inflicted, fully booked 6:10 a.m.-to-11 p.m. schedule can resume tomorrow. For now I’m sitting still.
Ciao for now,
Kailey
{ 31 comments… read them below or add one }
Hm I would hardly classify watching a tv show and reading a book for fun as a “schedule”
I’m usually writing or blogging while watching the tube, but that’s not the point. The point is that when should-be fun things become stressors or are even factored into a schedule, then it’s problematic. It’s a mindset, a control issue…not to mention the guilt factor.
It’s typically those days I wake up and write out a detailed to do list, that wind up being totally out of whack and off routine… but in a good way! Sometimes I second guess accepting an invitation out or an impromtu lunch date, but they are always always worth it in the end, and much better than staying in the lines right.
love it. totally.
Omg i lurrrrrve that tjs peanut soy vinegarette and you’ve just reminded me that i haven’t had /bought it in forever! glad you had a good ” off ” (well, somewhat) day, girl! you deserve it, fo sho!!
I completely understand how you feel! I’m constantly writing lists of all the things I need to get done, and while it feels great to cross off each thing—the list itself becomes ‘stressful’ and I say screw it all together…”I’ll do it tomorrow.” And then tomorrow becomes even more stressful! Such a silly, silly game to play. Just need to remind ourselves that life won’t end if we don’t make it to the gym one night, or don’t do the load of whites that have been sitting in the laundry basket for 2 weeks…. :/ oops!
I’ve been looking for those wedges everywhere! can’t wait for the review
i hear ya, i feel like i’m always telling myself i can/can’t do something because then i can/can’t do something else. sometimes we all need a chill day to forget x,y, and z altogether!
Although I read a lot of blogs, yours is definitely my favourite. I’ve particularly enjoyed the last couple of posts which remind me of how you used to write a year or two ago. Either way I think it’s all excellent and I admire the way you deal with the inevitable criticism that comes with doing something like this.
I love that “Don’t just do something, sit there.”
I feel like (as I am also crazy busy girl in my mid twenties) it is so easy to go, go, go without realizing that now is the time we should be allowing ourselves the time do to what we want, even if it is just sitting and reading a magazine for 2 hours. We have no dire responsibilities (such as kiddos yet) so we better soak it up while we can
I can empathise. When you’re working long hours and hitting the gym almost every day your “schedule” starts to feel very restricting and time for yourself gets pushed out.
Clear your mind, clear your plate, clear your schedule. Then start over.
Sounds like a good plan to me!
I’ve just learned to enjoy my limited and cherished downtime the past 6 months or so. I always spend my mornings making my schedule for the day, but sometimes by the time I exit the building nothing that I’ve planned for the day sounds do-able any more… C’est la vie!
Hi Kailey,
Hope that I’m not overstepping the mark, but have you thought about getting yourself tested for coeliacs or considered that you could be gluten intolerant or sensitive? I’m writing as a former sufferer of stomach pains and so I know how difficult and troubling it can be. Seitan can be tough on the tum!
Great post! That burger looks fantastic!
Sometimes a schedule can become very mundane-that’s when I find, for me, I like to mix it up a bit.
I am the same way! I find myself staring at my GoogleCalendar, Outlook Calendar, and to-do list for so long wondering how I will get it all done that I could have got something done or even relaxed if I hadn’t been spending all that time stressing. I feel too guilty to sit and watch TV that I often stand up and watch or walk around and do chores with it in the background. You’re def not alone
I fully support duff-sitting.
Oooh la la, that burger looks great! I fully support watching New Girl every Tuesday night
As a not-quite-vegan myself, it’s fun to try out the vegan products as well. Each step we can take is a good one! Been dying to get my hands on the new Daiya slices – let us know how you like that once you try it out!
I feel guilty for those moments too, like there’s always something “better” I could be doing.
I totally feel you here sista — I often find myself wrestling internally and freaking out when I take time to relax. I should be working out! I should be crossing things off my to-do list! I should be doing XYZ! I think it’s so important (as you do too!) to take a break from that and take time to do whatever I want
xx
that is pretty good for $50 at whole foods! i need to just “sit” and be still…i promised myself to schedule in more meditation time. i haven’t yet though…
Can I just say I love this post? I totally have those kinds of days all the time. Starting with “I hate all my clothes” somehow involving French fries in my life, and then ending at whole foods wishing I had the funds to shop there endlessly. This post made me so happy that I’m not the only one who has days like this! Thanks Kailey!
Your former Yoga teach is very wise!
We live in a society were we are constantly on the go. We would al benefit more if we learned how to live in the moment and be still.
xo
Jocelyn
Amen! I have been sitting still for the past few days. I just don’t feel like doing anything once home from work.
You don’t like the Paris Wife? How far into it are you?
omg DAIYA WEDGE OF CHEESE? All I have seen here are shreds. I have to go check my Whole Foods TODAY!
Let us know if you like the flax snax! I keep eyeing them, but I’m too cheap to buy them without knowing if they’re good.
I have this thing with salads; I love restaurant salads, but preparing them myself seems to take all of the fun out. Sigh.
freakin whole foods….why must you be so expensive?!
lemme tell ya, a few years ago i made the switch from wf to kroger, and i save SOOOO much money now. they have a really awesome line of organics for much much cheaper than wf.
i just wish kroger had an awesome bulk section like wf
this was definitely me during college. class, gym/run, eat, do work, pass out…it was always a big decision to skip a workout and do my laundry while watching TV, but it was so necessary and actually made me feel a whole lot better than a workout would. the hardest part is doing it without feeling guilty.
I seem to be almost always multi-tasking, one thing is never enough… On my computer when watching TV [cannot remember the last time I sat still for a whole show], reading while eating, etc. I definitely could use a sit still session myself… Enjoy
Mmmm the Go Raw Pizza flavor Flax Snax are so good!! What flavor did you get?! And I used to love Daiya but it totally destroyed my GI and I can’t eat it anymore. TMI?!
That is amazing and inspiring. You should never feel guilty for taking a break once in a while; because if you don’t, then your body will feel like it is being “punished.”
Also, what happened to your cheetah’s? Do you still eat them? I actually tried making them, well I did, better than fries :p
<3
Hajer